Thursday, August 13, 2015

All things

Well, it's August.

This year has managed to be both the most wonderful and most difficult year of my life.  I've spent 11 months living in our quaint little bungalow with the love of my life.  My Mr. is my best friend and even with all of the frustrating, heart-breaking, antagonizing things that we've gone through in the past 10 months, I can still honestly say that I am the happiest I have ever been because every morning I wake up next to him.

I'll spare you all the boring details of this year.  Suffice it to say that there has been emotional, physical, and spiritual hurt around almost every corner.  It just keeps coming and I'm exhausted.

A few weeks ago I was watching the League of Legends LCS Summer Split with My Mr. and Bagel, my youngest sister.  We got to talking about different kinds of League merchandise that we would like to have and, long story short, I applied a week later for an open position with the company.

I was so very excited about the position that I could barely sleep that night.  I prayed about it -- almost constantly -- for the next few days and, at the same time, tried to convince myself to not get my hopes up.
The company emailed me today with a very kind rejection letter and I smiled sadly and told My Mr., "That's okay.  I like our home here and it would have been hard to move away.".  I'm incredibly disappointed, honestly, but a little relieved too.  This whole year has been a roller-coaster ride and I think, ultimately, moving across the country and starting a whole new life would have been too much for me right now.

I suppose all of this is to say: all things are for the glory of God.

I don't know His plan.  I don't know why things happen the way they do.  I don't know why our bodies hurt or fail.  I don't know why heartbreak is necessary sometimes.

But, I do know that He is good,

He is righteous,

He is holy and just,

And He will be glorified.

kaJo

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